“Yo! Bentley here – Tootsie and me took down the monstrous Bath Time! We got ‘The Art of Canine War’, turned a bookstore into a bunker, gathered our gang from Ruff-n-Ready, and marched to our puddly doom. But the joke’s on us. Turns out Bath Time ain’t a villain, just misunderstood like Broccoli Sushi. Tootsie even got Dino swimming! Tootsie: 1, Bath Time: 0. End of text. – B-man 🐾”

Listen to the story here

Well, let me set the scene. Pawsburg was asleep. Quite literally, as Tootsie and I, Bentley, pug extraordinaire and self-proclaimed mayor of Pawsburg, made our stealthy escape through White Westie Woods. There was a call to action, a dangerous villain named Bath Time was looming and we were the unlikely heroes set on eradicating this dreaded foe.

As we trotted along Beagle Beach, under the waning harvest moon, Tootsie suddenly halted, her caramel eyes widened, “Bentley, we need to recruit an army. A grand one.”

She was right. We ventured into The Wagging Tail bookstore, hoping to find some guidance. After all, a good leader is also a good reader. The pick of the day? ‘The Art of Canine War’. Right then, Dino, Tootsie’s trusty play doll, decided to make himself useful by doubling up as our portable bookstand.

With newfound strategy tucked under our waists (quite literally), we mapped out a plan at Bow Wow Bistro over some Grilled Chicken, Tootsie’s favorite. Keeping my need for sushi satiated, we ordered for some from The Cat’s Meow Sushi next door. We did make sure to steer clear of the Broccoli Sushi though, one look of that green villain could send Tootsie scampering.

Reinforcements were next on the agenda. Ruff-n-Ready was our best bet. With a ragtag group of allies joining our fellowship – a couple of fox terriers, a dapper shih tzu, and some lovable mutts – we were ready. I made a battle suit out of some hide left behind at The Tail Wagger’s Tailor, and Sir Tootsie, brave as any four-legged warrior could be, decided to face the battle ‘au natural.’

South Poodle Pond, our battlefield, was calm. Ominously so. Not surprising considering its nemesis was water. As the clock ticked closer to dreaded Bath Time, we assembled, barks drawn, tails raised. Fear ran rampant, sending cautionary growls among the clan.

Suddenly, Bath Time was upon us. ‘Charge,’ whimpered Tootsie, her voice barely audible over the sound of roaring water hoses. It was chaos, squirters whirring, fur soaking, and canine cries filling the air.

Many escaped, many bolted, and many more accepted their fate. But not Tootsie, she was determined. With Dino (now demoted as trusty sponge) in mouth, she sprang with gusto, heartwarming brown facial markings drawn into a grimace.

Unexpectedly, she began to laugh. It was an uproarious, crazy canine guffaw. The battle paused as all eyes fell on a drenched, grinning Tootsie rolling about joyfully in the water, her ‘fierce competitor’ Dino swimming around.

‘Oh, Bentley…’ she managed in between her laughter, ‘all this time I was the villain, not Bath Time. Look how Dino enjoys it!’

It’s funny how life turns out in Pawsburg. Or perhaps, it was Tootsie. Our everyday turned sitcom. Our nightmare turned adventure. Our villain turned hero. She wasn’t just a dog anymore, she was Tootsie, the Bernese Mountain Dog that tackled Bath Time and won.

The End.